Karen Cohn is a retired center college particular schooling instructor who was recognized with follicular lymphoma in July 2020. Atone for all of Karen’s blogs right here!
Ready for check outcomes is irritating, annoying, exasperating, and… and… did I say irritating already? 4 and a half years in the past, I used to be recognized with follicular lymphoma, a type of blood most cancers that’s thought of treatable, however continual and incurable. I completed remedy 4 years in the past and am presently NED (no proof of illness — remission to most individuals), however the continual and incurable half means I’ve to see my oncologist commonly, which at this level is each six months. Each go to includes blood work, however the one in January includes a CT scan, which I had this morning, in preparation for my appointment with my oncologist subsequent week.
Blood work is fairly routine; the outcomes come again in a number of hours, get posted to MyChart, and normally there are only a few, if any, surprises. Regardless of being a blood most cancers, follicular lymphoma hardly ever exhibits up in blood work. All of my blood work besides one issue was regular earlier than prognosis, and that one might imply a variety of issues, so it’s not significantly useful if it adjustments. However a CT scan is how I used to be recognized, fully out of the blue; my physician thought I had a blood clot in a lung (which additionally match the signs), so she despatched me for a CT scan; the prognosis got here again possible lymphoma, potential leukemia and I used to be floored. So ready for outcomes makes me nervous.
It doesn’t assist that my medical facility — like so many others — is commonly backed up and doesn’t prioritize deciphering and posting what are (to them) routine assessments. Final 12 months presently, they had been so backed up that the outcomes weren’t accessible on MyChart at the beginning of my appointment with my oncologist. I had visions of being advised they’d withheld them as a result of the most cancers was again; they will’t (there are legal guidelines about releasing check outcomes), however that’s the place my thoughts went, as a result of that’s what anxiousness does.
So right here I sit, ready for my check outcomes. I’ll get an electronic mail after they’re in, so I’m compulsively checking my electronic mail whereas I attempt to distract myself from compulsively checking my electronic mail. Objectively, I’ve no cause to be involved–however then, my signs didn’t begin till a month or two earlier than prognosis, and my oncologist thinks it was in all probability rising for 5 to 10 years earlier than that, so objectivity shouldn’t be significantly helpful right here. Subjectively, I’m imagining all types of unhealthy issues popping out of this.
I perceive that outcomes aren’t prompt. I perceive that different individuals have their very own anxiousness and are in all probability worse off than I’m. However that goes again to objectively versus subjectively – and subjectively, the stress is absolutely, actually excessive.
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