Probably the most putting rules in Ikebana is the celebration of asymmetry — of the pure, the irregular, the imperfect. A department that bends unexpectedly, a flower that leans to 1 aspect, the uneven variety of stems. In Western flower arranging, we frequently search symmetry, steadiness, perfection. However Ikebana teaches us that true magnificence lies in accepting issues as they’re, not as we want they’d be.
Most cancers modifications our our bodies in methods we by no means selected. Scars from surgical procedure, hair that grows again in a different way, vitality that ebbs and flows unpredictably. With CLL, I’ve discovered that my physique now not follows the patterns I as soon as took with no consideration. Some days I really feel robust; different days, inexplicably drained.
My blood counts rise and fall in their very own rhythm, not the one I’d favor.
I used to withstand this asymmetry, mourning the physique I as soon as had, the life that adopted predictable patterns. However Ikebana taught me one thing else: what if this irregular, modified physique — like that bent department — has its personal integrity, its personal magnificence?
What if acceptance isn’t giving up, however somewhat the deepest type of self-compassion? We don’t drive the department to be straight. We discover the association the place its pure curve turns into essentially the most fascinating a part of the design.
Once I first sat earlier than these flowers in Kyoto, Japan, ready for them to talk to me, I didn’t know I used to be additionally studying easy methods to dwell with persistent lymphocytic leukemia or any sort of most cancers. I didn’t know that the endurance required to hear, the acceptance of impermanence, the deal with this current second, the embrace of asymmetry — all of this could change into not simply an aesthetic apply, however a path by means of the journey of most cancers. The trainer who taught me spoke little, letting the flowers themselves change into the lecturers. Of their delicate stems bending towards the sunshine, of their inevitable fading, in the way in which every bloom claimed its personal distinctive house, I used to be witnessing a philosophy I might desperately want when my prognosis arrived.
Silence, I’ve discovered, will not be empty. It’s full — stuffed with risk, of presence, of that small nonetheless voice that guides us once we’re prepared to hear. Whether or not we’re arranging flowers or arranging our lives round therapy schedules, oncology consultations, assessments, and unsure futures, the apply is identical: create house, settle for impermanence (wabi sabi), keep current, embrace what’s. The Japanese idea of ‘ma’ – the destructive house that offers which means to kind — applies equally to our days. Between appointments, between worries, between one breath and the subsequent, there exists this house the place we will merely be. It’s in these pauses that we discover our resilience, our capability to proceed, our capability to note the sunshine nonetheless filtering by means of the window.
I invite you, in your individual journey with most cancers, to search out your model of Ikebana — whether or not it’s precise flower arranging, meditation, or just moments of intentional silence. Discover the apply that helps you hear. As a result of in that listening, in that silence, we uncover we’re not simply surviving. We’re creating one thing — an association of our days in a manner that honors each the problem and the sweetness, each the concern and the profound presence that most cancers can educate us.
This piece displays the creator’s private expertise and perspective. For medical recommendation, please seek the advice of your well being care supplier.
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